I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
