I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
