Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Randomize
