he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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