fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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