I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
