There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
