I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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