I want to stick my p in your. b.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
