Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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