We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
