i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
