why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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