I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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