it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
