Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
