At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize