a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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