sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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