Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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