Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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