haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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