We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize