our cab driver is having phone sex.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
