Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
