I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Everyone says I win the strip club
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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