Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
