we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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