i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
