"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Randomize
