Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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