you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
