A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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