I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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