My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
