She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
