im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
