He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
i permit you to call me
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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