Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Randomize
