Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
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