Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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