I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
honey bunches of taint.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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