1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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