Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
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