i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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