If i come over, it means nothing
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
