I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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