i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
