mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I see more hoeing in ur future
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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