hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
You are the jesus of drinking
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Randomize
